[Recording Session, Session ID SEA#0006]
The camera flickers to life and presents a close shot of an Elf’s face exploding with joy.
“Heeey, Doc.”, Frettchen greets the virtual psychiatrist’s projection as she giddily sits on top of a muscle car’s hood. The vehicle radiates with a raw, menacing presence, depsite the fact it’s just a huge red Ford, parked at the seaside. “I’ve got good news, even better news and great news!”
“Good evening. Well… I suppose start with the good news, then, miss Aidee?”
“Alright…”, she says, unable to wipe the grin off her face. “Solved the cybertrolling, so you and all other utilities are in relative safety now. Went to that annoying little shit’s crib and trashed it good. Thought he wanted revenge, ‘cause I stabbed him once or twice…”
“Excuse me, did you just say you stabbed someone?!”, the doctor asks, far less shocked than you would expect.
“Yeah… let’s not dwell on that! I had a talk with that funny little agent of his, and it claimed he’s innocent, so I had this hunch, kinda sorta.”
She pats the car with affection usually reserved for beloved pets. “This one here? I think she’s alive! Aliiiive!”, she almost whispers. “And in a constant state of psychotic urge for action, carnage and vengeance! And she wanted to come back at me for planting a Harley right into her face… Windshield, whatever! Isn’t that awesome?! And now we’re friends!”
The doctor passes on the digital high five and rests his forehand in the palm of his hand instead.
“Miss Aidee, while a remarkable old-timer, it seems to be a perfectly normal Ford Americar. Your… tendency of personifying objects, while a good, stabilizing approach to improve your mental health, begins to worry me…”
“Psh, right, says the personified object…”, Frettchen protests.
“Anyway…”, the software continues, “I must also confess… I’m not trained to be a diary for your accumulative record of crimes. I have little counsel to offer on these matters.”
“Duly noted, Doc. Point is, this roaring beast of a car followed me home, and I’m gonna keep her! Gotta ditch the Honda, I think…”
The doctor clears his throat. “That seems, all things considered, reasonable. Is there anything else you want to talk about?”
His question was sprinkled with hope for a ‘Yes’ and also a silent plea that he didn’t just jump out of the frying pan into the fire.
“Yeah, let’s move on…. I got a new job at the local clinic. I’m a medic again! Off the streets, though. Boss said they don’t have a proper ambulance and I’d be needed most where the butchering happens anyway.”
She sighs contently and lets her cybernetic legs dangle in front of the radiator grill, as if tempting a sleeping beast. “He’s an okay dude, I guess. Bit of stick in the mud when it comes to clinic rules, but it’s all fair enough.”
“So you did enjoy being back in the saddle, so to speak? It could be an important step to come to terms with your past.”
“Eh, Doc, my past… It’s a wave of shit I enjoy riding on. Just have to be careful I don’t fall off the board, you know? But yeah… It’s nice. Yelling at patients, doin’ some stitching and annihilating coffee with the other burnouts. Good counterweight, I guess..
The grin sneaks back into her face as she goes on. “And you know what’s the best part of aaall this?!”
“Please do enlighten me, Miss Aidee.”
“I got my husband back!”
Both of them have to let that sink in for a few seconds.
“Yeah, that’s right, against the odds and with the best french greeting we could pull off we reunited after 17 fucking years. He’s a sheriff here of some sort. It’s weird to see how old he got, but he’s still a well oiled, thoroughly maintained high performance machine, if you get my gist.”
Her thoughts drift off for a few moments as her grin grows even wider and she lets out a dirty laugh.
“Jesus, it’s so good to have him back… And you should see the look on people’s faces when they hear we’re married… Oh wait, you can!”, she says gleefully and shows footage of the doctor’s face, frozen in utter disbelief during the last session.
“I am… Glad that you reclaimed some happiness. You should keep this man close, he seems genuinely good for you. Is there anything else on your mind?”
“Nah, I think that’s it. I want to take my new monster for a ride. Kinda feel in the mood for a BBQ , too…”